Weblog
Monday, 22 December 2008
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What is love?... Baby don't hurt me
So, I was talking with a friend tonight about love, and he was insisting that he always tries to "love everyone", that we should all attempt to give everyone (even those we don't particularly like) our love.. spread joy, love, etc. etc. crap crap.
I, on the other hand, believe that love is not something that should be thrown around everywhere, as it is so commonly today. I believe that love is something that should be earned. It is something that you feel for your closest friends, for your family. When you truly LOVE someone, you'll feel it. in your bones. in your soul. It's not something that's just used nonchalantly on a drunken night when you see that girl from class (who you've seen what.. 3 times maybe?), wrap your arms around her and yell loudly "OMG! I LOVE YOU! (insert name here)". Don't lie, we've all done it at least once. While I'm not gonna go around trying to love everyone around me, I will certainly try to respect them. There is a difference.
Maybe my definition of love is just tighter than his (or maybe yours). While my friend preaches the whole, loving mankind, loving my fellow human brethren, I feel like love is not something you can just give out freely. When spoken, this is a powerful word... at least when it's actually being intended. My friend was telling me the other day that her boyfriend (of just a couple months) told her he loved her... and while she said it back, they both admitted later that it felt weird... that it just didn't feel right.. yet. And they haven't said it since. While it doesn't mean they don't love each other, it certainly proves just how powerful the true emotion can be... My friend can easily say she loves me... in fact, she easily says 'i love you' at the end of phone conversations to a bunch of her newly acquainted girlfriends. And yet she can't say it to her boyfriend who she spends (basically) 24/7 with. From my point of view, this is a just a superficial use of the word. An abuse almost.
What's your definition of love? Do you think it should be given out freely? Sparingly? Who do you truly love?... now, then. Would you give your life up for the people you just named? -
Heyyy! welcome to winter break
I am officially done with my first semester of college. It's ridiculous to think how fast time has passed. I distinctly remember receiving my acceptance letter over TWO YEARS ago. wow, I actually never realized it's been two years...
the anticipation, the expectation of this institution has been incomparable to anything else. The day I became a college student would officially mark the day I finished my career in gymnastics and became a "normal" student. And now here I am, already done with first semester. How has it been?
Well. Being as it is YALE and all. I guess I had just built it up to be much more than it actually ended up being. In the beginning of the semester, I kept waiting for that moment, that MOMENT when I would be hit with some wave of amazement that damn, I am at Yale. That magical moment, when all my expectations from the last two years would culminate, and i would be falling over my feet in excitement that I was at my dream school.
Yea that never happened.
I kind of just kept going day after day, kind of just floating through... I mean yea, I noticed the gothic architecture, the pretty trees, the college traditions, but I had expected so much more. I noticed some classmates GUSHING about how simply mahvelous the campus was, and how they couldn't believe they were at Yale. And while I admitted that it was pretty, that was about it. There was nothing 'Harry potter' magical about it.
And well, my fairytale moment never actually did come, but I think I've come to terms with the fact that my situation was different. I took a year off. I lived away from my family for a year. I've always been independent. And, i've had a full 2 years to build up enormous expectations. For a lot of people, simply the prospect of living on their own away from their parents is enough to make ANY place seem fantastic. I didn't get to experience that 'shock culture' of college life. And I mean, I've definitely started to realize just how amazing it is that I am at such a high ranked institution. Just last week, some (drunk) student was saying how it was pretty ridiculous that we were considered pretty much the top 5% of society... which is pretty ridiculous to think about. I certainly don't feel like in comparison to my peers, but I guess that's what happens to all of us when we're placed amongst other ridiculously high-acheiving people.
But anyway, my first college winter break is starting! 3 weeks of time at home... well not exactly home since my parents decided to move me halfway across the country a month before college started.. so hurray for spending 3 weeks by myself. Bring on the holiday weight :( -
Hi everyone! I'm just getting started on Xanga... Drop me a comment if you've got some ideas on what to do first - or just to say, "Hi!"
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